Geez. Perhaps I should have posted this one first. My introduction seems completely void of the usual sarcasm I employ...I worry it may have given a false impression.
Like my blog title photo? How is THAT for a photogenic pair? Obviously, those charmers are NOT products of my own gene pool. Those are my good pals, W and L and I spend my summers with them. They truly are as silly and fun as they look. I've been their summer nanny for 3 years now and it's been quite an adventure, to say the least.
Most of this summer has been spent pleading to a four-year-old perched on his porcelain throne, bartering fish crackers, Toy Story movie time and other toddler luxuries in exchange for some serious toilet action and stain-free underwear. I'm thirty years old, college-educated and the majority of my daily conversation includes the phrases, "Oh, the dog can't WAIT to see your poopies." "Let's count. Let's count and push those super poopies right OUT. 1...2...3...PUSH!" I'm not proud. I've set aside all dignity and commitment to educational stimulation and nutritional guidelines. Oh, sure, I dedicate structured time to counting to five and sorting various objects. We do specific exercises to strengthen fine motor skills and insist on spending 20 minutes every morning dressing to practice his occupational strategies. But I will happily cast aside the morning's schedule of fundamental learning and let that kid eat bags of fish-shaped cheese crackers and watch cartoon movies until his eyes glaze over if he will just crap in the pot instead of the fresh "Thomas the Train" drawers I've already washed three times this week.
He's usually a sport about the whole thing and works to negotiate his way out of it...
"Idea...'kay?" He interrupts my last request to FINISH THE JOB...
"Okay, W...what's your good idea?"
"YOU...(points dramatically and with emphasis at my forehead from his toilet perch)...go HOME...doggies....nap...."
"Well, W I would actually love to go home and take a nap with my dogs right now, but we have a bowel movement in progress here. C'mon. Just toot."
"HEY!" he interrupts me with a finger to my lips...the finger that has been ceaselessly occupying itself in areas that inspire my screeches of "Hands DOWN, W."...Can Purell be used as an antibacterial lip balm?)
"HEY...boogers and size."
Now he's appealing to my appetite...
"Ooooooo....good idea, W! We could have some burger and fries! We could go to SONIC! That is the happiest place in the world! Good, good, good idea! .....just as soon as you drop your load. Now PUSH."
This conversation could continue for hours if I let it. We have had some successful drop offs at the pool lately, though, so maybe those cracker bribes are going to pay off after all...
5 comments:
Too funny. Thanks for telling us on RR about your blog. I hope to follow along on your journey.
Joy
Great Work!! I like your sense of humor! I also spent a lot of my summer "getting on the potty train." fun stuff. I used the jelly belly reward, although he found out where I was hiding them and was helping himself to them on a regular basis without me knowing about it. 2 for poop, one for pee--haha Thank you for letting us follow along w/your adoption journey. I have been trying unsuccessfully to talk my husband into adopting a ds child. I now just read blogs and pray for a miracle. We also have been matched through RR to a little girl in the Ukraine that we pray for daily. We pray for a family to find her. She is ADORABLE!!!! Good Luck to you on your journey!
This post just cracked me up! I have your blog marked on my blog reader so I can follow your journey.
Do you know about the Down Syndrome Association of Greater Cincinatti? They keep a list of people who are open to adopting a child with Down Syndrome in order to encourage expectant parents to give their babies a chance at life. Another group, CHASK.org does something similar but it is with children with all types of special needs. You can tell them which special needs you are open to and then they will call you if they are contacted about a situation that fits you. We received a call about a child with DS a few months ago (but were not able to go forward at the time) and I know of other families who have told me about kids with DS through CHASK. Registration with both groups is free, too!
I'm not trying to pull you away from international (my 3 kids are all adopted internationally) - just wanted you to know that there are a few groups here in the US that see the value of these beautiful kiddos!
C&J-
I feel your potty training pain. Somedays it is just easier to change a pull up than it is to bribe our way through the day. Other days, it is just easier to watch him drop his pants outside and "water the flowers". (Thanks grandma K). Don't take S to a rodeo with you, he too becomes a stress case, worried that the fence isn't big enough and the bulls are going to get him. Bull riding is not fun for S, or consequently any of us. :) Anyway, thanks for sharing, and prayers are with you and your future baby and the birth parents that will recognize your strength and blessing for such a special babe. My friends just went through an international adoption, what chaos. Blessings! RRK
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