Saturday, August 2, 2008

Introducing us...

Hopefully this blog will serve as a way to help our family and friends and all the countless people who have showered us with support in the past few months keep up with our progress. Since this has been frantic bursts of excitement followed by long periods of nothing, our blog will also share anecdotes and reflections of our experiences in between as well...

If this is our first introduction, I hope you enjoy your time spent with us. If you're one of the many family and friends encouraging us outside the scope of the internet, we're so delighted you're still checking in to see how things are and where we're at in this crazy process...

Justin and I have been married for three years, but I've been chasing him for much longer. We live in a Kansas City suburb with our neurotic dogs and any other homeless animal I can manage to sneak into the house when Justin's still at work. (To date, that's: two dogs, one tarantula, two rabbits and a turtle.)

I'm an elementary teacher and Justin is a creative wizard who works as an interior architect during the day. I put his talents to GOOD USE, my friends, and can safely say I have some of the most stunning bulletin boards this side of the Mississippi. We both rely pretty heavily on our senses of humor (anyone living with me full time would have to) and we both love to laugh and find fun wherever we can.

Justin has found himself in a unique marriage to a 30 year old woman with a 7 year old's personality. Every Saturday morning I can be found eating a bowl of Lucky Charms marshmallows and watching Veggie Tales. (I save the cereal bits for Justin. I tell myself it's what any caring wife does when she wants to ensure her husband consumes as much whole grain as possible). I'd rather have a new pack of Sharpie colored markers than a manicure and I only willingly go to movies that are animated features. My favorite breakfast is peanut butter M & M's and Justin learned a long time ago that flowers don't phase me, but I am completely swept off my feet by pink polka-dotted high heels.

Justin is meticulous to my maniacal and detailed to my disorganized. I catch and "set free" the spiders he'd rather kill and he cuts the grass while I bake the cookies. We're a good balance, really, and I can't think of a better person to be on this adventure with. I sometimes feel like I'm running at full speed tied to a Justin boulder, but he's also the reason I don't completely fall down the cliffs I accidentally leap off of. Since we began our relationship, I've turned his predictable life on its head and he's taken mine and steadily set it right.

I grew up with a Great Uncle (my grandpa's older brother) who had Down syndrome and I have always lived in a culture that celebrated these quirky, stubborn, lovely, stumbling, angelic stubborn people. In high school and college I babysat for children with DS and then spent an amazing summer as an academic advisor at a summer camp exclusively for campers with DS and other genetic conditions in Pennsylvania. I've always known that I had a soft and specific place in my heart for individuals with DS, but only recently considered the possibility of parenting a child with DS when I visited the Reece's Rainbow website. Since then, I've drug Justin through a baptism of fire in adoption and Down Syndrome education and he's valiantly wrapped his bewildered brain around as much information as he can as we go along. Luckily, his heart is bigger than mine and his patience shames me. I've been awestruck countless times as he's stepped up to defend an adoption he would have never considered 10 months ago.

We have spent months pursuing a domestic situation and have been so surprised at the education it has provided and the shortcomings of our national adoption system. I stopped counting the number of agencies who responded to our inquiries with "Please contact us when you are interested in adopting a healthy child" or the states that explained they would place a child in their state's foster system before allowing an out-of-state resident to adopt them.

We have also been blown away by the amazing people we have come in contact with. While private and public agencies have left me pulling my hair out, I have had so many individuals personally touched by DS stepping in to encourage us when I've just about given up. Their stories and suggestions have carried us farther I'd ever have imagined a few sentences could. It's been strange relying on strangers to prove that we're not as invisible as we often feel, but they have always come through...and with flying colors.

We've started to consider the option of adopting internationally. While I have no doubt there are situations to be found within the United States, I can't help but be affected by the bombardment of children currently confirmed as needing homes in other parts of the world. I'm sorry our own government hasn't worked to unite resources and information to provide immediate intervention for children in need of specifically passionate adoptive parents, but I know there are profoundly eloquent, intelligent and dedicated individuals currently working to change that scenario. I'm anxious to count myself as one of them...

2 comments:

Lou said...

Hi,
I found out about your blog on Reece's Rainbow--- I love your writing! I look forward to following your adoption journey! We've just started another one of our own.

Tracie said...

Found your blog at Reece's Rainbow.
We're from KC too. Our first adoption was domestic and our second has just begun through Reece's Rainbow.

I also work educating and helping couples who want to adopt domestically. I agree that our whole national adoption system needs to be shaken up and turned inside out.

We'll be posting our adoption plans on our blog soon, but just started the process YESTERDAY!